Life update

Life updates are becoming pretty routine around here! And let's be honest, this is a big one for those who don't personally know me.

Along side our big, unexpected pregnancy announcement (due in February 2018), I quit my full time job at the end of February 2017. You might be wondering why, because I wouldn't have yet been pregnant (conceived at the end of May). Here are the two reasons.

1. Medical Assisting was never the end of the road for me. Ever. I got my associates degree in medical assisting right out of high school. Why? Because I had zero clue what I wanted to do with my life. But it didn't take me long to realize I had to go back to school- for hopefully a more challenging career. After working 4 years as a medical assistant, I grew tired of the same day to day routine, so I started my bachelors degree in health science and minored in human biology. Why? Because I have a thing for science and the human body. What did I hope to do with this degree? Clinical research or some form of medical sales. That has proven to be my biggest challenge yet. Finding someone to give me the time of day in those fields. I partially blame it on me being so complacent in my last job for so long after completing my degree in December 2015.

2. That particular job was no longer serving or growing me. I loved that job the first few years I was there. I had fun relationships with people and enjoyed my time with them outside of work. Then things changed. Employees who should have been looked at as valuable for doing their jobs without having to be told how to do them didn't get any recognition. There was poor morale. People became catty, so I started keeping to myself. Which in turn bit me in the hindend, but I'd do it all over again because I only make room for loyal, uplifting people in my life. The handful of people who I valued were really difficult to leave behind, but I have not had one ounce of regret walking away from a situation that no longer benefited me. I left work feeling emotionally drained and started seeing myself losing compassion for the people in my life who needed it the most, all while going through fertility treatments and testing myself earlier this year. It was too much. And noone knew what my life actually looked like outside of work because they didn't genuinely care or ask.

Quitting my job has been a financial struggle on and off, one that's given us moments of complete fear and exhaustion. And now being pregnant, I'm faced with "what to I do from here to help better our financial situation until the baby arrives?" The obvious answer is "get a job". I have put in more applications than I thought possible to submit in this time frame, but now I have to break the news to potential employers "oh, by the way, I'm leaving indefinitely in February." I know these struggles are what make us stronger and more resilient, but the struggle has been real. Brent has been as supportive as he can be through this, which I'm thankfuk for. And I know God has a plan far bigger than I can see, just the same as he had a plan for our unexpected pregnancy.

You may be wondering what I've been up to since quitting. I was doing a good amount of furniture refinishing prior to getting pregnant which really helped offset the lack of a second income. I'm hoping to get back into it until I find a "real" job. I'm feeling much better now that the second trimester has begun!

I wish I had more exciting and fun news to share, but let's be real. Life's not always easy or glamorous. These last handful of months have been the least productive months yet. I think back to how much I forced myself to accomplish while working full time and it's almost embarrassing what I get accomplished now!